Monday Motivator #8 2025-26

 

3 Habits of Highly Effective Coaches

https://fullfocusplanner.com/effective-coaches/
How to Step Back, Ask Questions, and Get Results

If you’ve ever had the benefit of a great coach, you know just how powerful coaching can be. But leaders know it can sometimes be difficult to coach the people on your own team.

It’s one of the main reasons people are reluctant to delegate work in their Drudgery and Disinterest Zones. It takes so much time and effort we’re tempted to throw in the towel, even though it would save us tons of time in the long run.

But it doesn’t have to be so frustrating.

I recently spoke with coaching expert Michael Bungay Stanier about his new book The Coaching Habit, which can help us all to get the most out of coaching for the least effort.

“Your job as a leader and a manager is to help people become more competent, more confident, more capable, more autonomous,” he says. “Because that helps them, but honestly it helps you. Because I’m betting nobody here is going ‘Well thank goodness I can just coach people all day because I’ve got nothing else to do.'”

Bungay Stanier warns there’s something standing in the way of good life coaching: our own instincts. We often approach coaching in exactly the wrong way.

There are three habits we must adopt to make coaching better for us, better for those who we are coaching, and better for our organizations: give less advice, ask questions instead, and ask the kind of questions that help our teammates learn and grow.

1. Give Less Advice
The first change is something we need to stop doing, or at least drastically slow down. When members of our team come to us seeking feedback, we jump in with advice. That’s the wrong reflex to have, but it’s all too common.

“We are all advice-giving maniacs,” Bungay Stanier cautions. “We love it. We don’t even know what the problem is, but we’ve got some thoughts about how to go around fixing it.”

All this rampant advising “feels pretty good,” he admits. It flatters us, and sometimes it even solves specific, small problems. But it creates a bigger problem: Our teams, those who we are coaching, become too dependent on us for answers. It stymies their development and it frustrates us as more and more requests for help mount.

The blame here often lies with ourselves. Our quick answers have sent the wrong message, training them to rely on us and not work things out for themselves. It’s “debilitating for them, exhausting for you,” Bungay Stanier says.

The first habit we must adopt is becoming slow to offer advice. What do we offer instead?

2. Ask Questions Instead
Bungay Stanier looks to science for how our brains are wired for success or failure. He learned,

Neuroscience says that if people are feeling autonomous, feeling that they are important, feeling like they are clear on what’s happening, feeling like you’re with them, they’re much more likely to stay engaged and actually bring the best of themselves.

Asking questions is the best way to promote those feelings. That’s the second habit.

When a team member pops in your office or Slack channel to request help solving a problem, probe them first. Say, “That’s a great question. Before I share my ideas, what ideas do you already have?” and listen.

I’ve done this myself and so often it works. People usually come up with the answer that I would have given them, but it’s ten times more powerful because they come up with it on their own. They feel brilliant. They feel smart. And the problem gets solved.

But what if their first answers clearly miss the mark? Should you jump right in with the right one? No.

3. Ask Better Questions
Try something else first. Ask, “What else could you do?” Bungay Stanier calls this the “best coaching question in the world.” The point isn’t to grill your team member but to force them to expand their thinking on the subject and to show them that you actually value their thinking and would like for them to do more of it.

Asking questions designed to help team members learn and grow is the third habit.

Some expert coaches go so far as to take a purely Socratic approach. Bungay Stanier doesn’t say that. He acknowledges that your experiences are useful too, and can be shared. But he says it is hugely important that we ask questions and that we learn to ask better questions as we go.

“People do not learn when you tell them stuff,” says Bungay Stanier. “It goes in one ear. It goes out the other ear pretty quickly.”

Experience is a great teacher, but it’s limited by itself. Our people really grow “when they have a moment to reflect on what just happened.” You can help put them in that state of mind by asking a very specific question: “What was most useful or most valuable about this for you?”

It’s a great question in an unbelievably useful book. And there’s so much more to it than what I can fit in one blog post. These days coaching is my No. 1 job. If I had read The Coaching Habit earlier in my career, I’m confident I would have seen better, faster results with far less frustration.

Which of these three habits do you need to adopt in your coaching?

Monday Motivator #7 2025-26

From Wiggly to Wise: How Morning Meetings Build Self-Aware Kids

https://casel.org/blog/from-wiggly-to-wise-how-morning-meetings-build-self-aware-kids/

The beginning of my third year of teaching Kindergarten brought me a challenge I’ll never forget—a student who had 47 tantrums in one day. These outbursts, triggered by impatience or not being called on, could last from 2 to 30 minutes. I tried strategies like breathing exercises, calm activities, and breaks in the calming corner. While some worked occasionally, others made the situation worse.

Over time, I leaned heavily into SEL practices—especially morning meetings and feelings check-ins. At first, this student struggled to sit through the meeting but always participated in check-ins. Over the course of about four months, after consistent practice, listening, and modeling, I saw gradual progress. Then one day, during a difficult moment, the student paused and said, “I feel frustrated!”—a breakthrough that reflected months of emotional scaffolding and trust-building.

Since then, tantrums have decreased dramatically, and the student now identifies and expresses emotions regularly. One day, my growing friend even comforted a sad classmate by saying, “It’s okay—you’ll get picked next time!”

Morning Meetings in Action
Every morning, my students gather on the rug for our morning meeting. Here’s how it works:These activities support self-management and prepare us for a day of learning and growth

Feelings Check-In: Each child shares how they’re feeling and why, using a visual chart of emotions. Some days we SHOW how we feel with our body and face, without using our voices.

Expectations Review

Student of the Day Question: The student of the day answers a thought-provoking question while classmates practice active listening—eyes on the speaker, hand signals to connect, and voices off.

Mindful Breathing and Yoga: Using a Hoberman sphere, we practice belly breathing, then the student of the day selects a yoga pose of the day.

These activities support self-management and prepare us for a day of learning and growth.

The Impact in my Classroom
The results of these practices have been extraordinary. From September to December, our class grew from 64% to 86% at or above grade level in Math, and from 63% to 73% in Reading. That’s a remarkable amount of growth in just four months—and I believe our daily SEL routines played a key role. When students are emotionally regulated and connected to their learning environment, they’re more able to focus, take risks, and engage.
While one student made a breakthrough by naming their emotions instead of acting out, others made equally significant strides. A student with autism spectrum disorder (ASD), who couldn’t sit still or attend to a group meeting at the start of the year, gradually learned to participate fully. The consistency of our routine created a sense of safety and predictability that allowed them to thrive.Another shared they felt “frustrated that their brother wasn’t being nice in the car but happy because Mom let them listen to their favorite song.” Moments like these show how deeply these routines resonate. 

In fact, many students today struggle with sitting still, listening to others, and showing attention—especially post-COVID. But after months of practicing mindful listening during feelings check-ins, our class became known for their ability to sit attentively and respectfully. During assemblies and classroom visits, our principal and other teachers frequently commented that my students were the most capable listeners they’d seen.
My classroom has transformed from a group of wiggly five-year-olds rolling on the rug to a community that listens, respects boundaries, and resolves conflicts. These aren’t
just academic skills—they’re life skills.
Research That Backs it Up
Morning meetings aren’t just feel-good routines—they’re grounded in research. CASEL’s framework emphasizes the importance of the five core SEL competencies in fostering academic and social success.
Durlak et al. (2015) found that effective SEL programs improve social behaviors, reduce emotional distress, and increase academic achievement. Morning meetings, with their focus on emotional regulation and connection, create the structure needed for these outcomes.

Schlund, Jagers, and Schlinger (2020) highlight SEL as a lever for equity. By teaching emotional regulation and active listening, morning meetings provide tools that benefit all students, particularly those who face challenges in social or emotional development.
Start Your Morning Meetings Today
Morning meetings are adaptable to any grade level. Even a simple daily feelings check-in can make a big difference. Build on it with mindfulness practices, affirmations, or a student spotlight, and watch your classroom transform.
SEL isn’t just a subject; it’s the foundation for lifelong success. Let’s start the day right—one morning meeting at a time.

About the Author
Katie Jo Olsen, M.A. SEL, B.Ed., is a kindergarten teacher and advocate for equity-driven, trauma-informed SEL. She creates emotionally responsive classrooms that help young learners grow in self-awareness and empathy. Her work blends research, routine, and heart.

Monday Motivator #6 2025-26

 

I thought this short clip aligns well with our SBL work and promoting each individual's growth.

https://www.facebook.com/share/r/19rVuFQMKH/?mibextid=wwXIfr

(Don't need to have a Facebook account to view, just close out of the pop up).

Monday Motivator #5 2025-26

 

10 Ways to Sabotage Your Classroom Management

by MiddleWeb ·  Updated 08/03/2024

https://www.middleweb.com/19037/10-ways-sabotage-classroom-management/

By Jennifer Gonzalez

You know the basics: Establish clear rules and consequences, be consistent, keep students engaged. But even with all that in place, the small things you do could be wreaking havoc on your whole system.

Here are some habits you might have developed that are messing with your classroom management, along with more effective alternatives.

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1. Smiling at the Wrong Times

This was a big problem for me. I thought my students were pretty funny people, so when a kid took those first steps to get us off-track, I couldn’t help but smile. And that just encouraged him to continue. The irony was that five minutes later, I would be yelling at the whole class for getting too wild. Duh.

Alternative: Make a conscious effort to hold a neutral, “on-task” facial expression when you need your class to be focused. I still think it’s important to show students you have a sense of humor and appreciate theirs, but everyone needs to learn that there’s a time and place for it. Have a private conversation with your class clowns, letting them know that there will be times when you won’t react to their jokes – that will be your signal that it’s a “serious” time.

2. Handling Problems Publicly

Addressing student misbehavior in a public way risks embarrassing the student, and if she is prone to being oppositional, she’s likely to talk back and dig herself into a deeper hole. You retaliate, and before you know it, a full-scale war has erupted.

Alternative: Whenever possible, address off-task behavior in private. Some teachers silently place a post-it note on the student’s desk to signal that a problem has occurred, then add a check mark for every subsequent infraction.

Others just speak in a quiet voice by the student’s desk or call the student up to their own. The method isn’t terribly important; just aim for a bare minimum of spectacle.

3. All Sound, No Sight

So many behavior problems start with students simply not understanding what they are supposed to do. This is especially true when teachers only give verbal directions instead of making them visual.

Alternative: Provide visual cues for what students are expected to do. If you want them to do steps 1-4 of today’s lab, then clean up their materials, then read silently for the rest of the period, go to the board and make a quick list: step 1-4, clean up, read. Simply writing those steps on the board will save you from having to remind students or reprimand them for not following the plan.

4. Not Waiting for Quiet

When I observe teachers, I see this mistake more often than any other: They start talking to the class before everyone has completely stopped talking. To be fair, they often wait until almost everyone is quiet, but allowing that last bit of chatter to linger causes problems: Students who don’t hear what you say will either (a) turn to a neighbor to ask, or (b) follow instructions incorrectly. It’s easy to blame kids for being poor listeners, but the problem could actually be the teacher’s timing.

Alternative: Before addressing your class, force yourself to wait a few extra seconds (about five) until everyone – everyone – is completely quiet.

5. Making Students Choose Between Listening and Reading

When you distribute a handout to students, do you give them quiet time to actually read it? Or do you keep talking, “going over it” and constantly interrupting them to the point where they can’t process any of it? When you do this, you guarantee that students will either skip over something important on the document, or miss a vital bit of information you gave verbally. The brain can’t do both at once.

Alternative: If you have preliminary remarks to make before giving students written material, do your talking first, then pass out the papers. Once students have the document in hand, tell them you’re going to give them a few minutes to read it. Then…BE QUIET. If you must interrupt, have students turn their papers face-down and look at you, then give the announcement.

6. Only Speaking in “Don’ts”

If I tell you not to think about a hot fudge sundae, what do you think about? Yep, a hot fudge sundae. Similarly, if you tell a seventh grade boy not to tap his pencil, he still has pencil tapping on the brain.

Alternative: Tell students what to do. These directives can address the problem at hand (Jake, put your pencil under your textbook until I tell you to use it) or distract the student with another activity altogether (Jake, read number 4 for me, please).

7. Taking Too Long

When a student gets off-task, an ineffective teacher will waste five minutes lecturing her about it. This not only makes you lose valuable instructional time, it also annoys the heck out of the other students, who are forced to sit and watch.

Alternative: Just becoming aware of this problem will help you improve it. Remember, you don’t have to settle every issue right away; when an interaction drags on, tell the student you’ll finish talking after class.

8. Staying Up Front

Proximity is a huge key to stopping misbehavior before it gets going. If you’re always at the front of your classroom, you can’t pick up on trouble in the early stages. By the time you notice a problem, it’s already gained momentum, making it much harder to stop.

Alternative: Move around while you teach. Do it so casually and so regularly that students just expect it.

9. Focusing on the Problems

It’s natural to give your energy to misbehaviors, to only comment when something goes wrong, but you’ll get more cooperation if you give equal (or more) attention to the good behaviors, especially when it comes to students who have trouble with self-control.

Alternative: You’ve probably heard of “catch them being good,” but actually doing it takes concentration. For some students, you have to wait a while before the desirable behavior happens! Watch Daniel, the pencil-tapper: After you tell him to set his pencil down, does it stay there for a few minutes? Before he grabs it again, go over and say, “Thanks for keeping that pencil down.” Nine times out of ten, that will lengthen the time it takes for him to pick it up again.

10. Taking Things Personally

No matter what’s going on, taking student misbehavior as a personal affront can only make things worse. But not taking it personally is a lot easier said than done.

Alternative: A mental trick I used to help me step away from those hurt feelings was to think of myself as a service provider – like a dentist – and my students as patients. If my patient got a cavity, I would treat it as best I could, but I wouldn’t take it personally. If things don’t always go well, it doesn’t have to be about me.

Classroom management is so complex, it can take years to develop a style and a system that works. By replacing these habits with more effective practices, you’ll build a better classroom for everyone.

Illustrations by Jennifer Gonzalez

Monday Motivator #4 2025-26

 

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Positive Approaches to Change

You just can’t beat the person who never gives up.
—Babe Ruth

The Power of Just

I wandered up to the bonus room and was excited to see Charlie, my husband, working on the final coat of paint on the last wall.  The room was noticeably brighter and warmer.  It felt cleaned up and fresh.  “Wow,” I said, “it looks so good!”  
“Do you like it?” he asked.  We agreed that it was exciting to have this task wrapped up and marveled at how quickly he’d gotten it done.  “I just have to finish this wall, then the stairwell, and the last two rooms,” he said.  We looked at each other and broke into a fit of giggles.  
Just is a joke between Charlie and me.  Our last house was a series of home improvement projects that we could never get ahead of: We were raising four small children and both of us were working full-time, so time and money were a constant challenge.  As we finished each small step, Charlie would outline what needed to be done next with just. After gutting a bathroom he would say, “We just need to get plumbing and electrical taken care of, choose the tile, rent the tile cutter, get it tiled, pick out some cupboards, features, and so on….then put it back together.” 
Or after building a brick retaining wall out back, he said,  “We just need to purchase and move 72 units of dirt, install a sprinkler system, and research, choose, and plant trees and plants.” 
Somehow, starting the plan with just in front made it seem like the end was in sight, but really, the next steps were just as big as, or bigger than, the task we’d just finished.  But just gave us hope and laid out some steps forward.  
Somewhere along the way we noticed what we were doing with just and started laughing at ourselves, knowing that that just didn’t necessarily mean we were anywhere close to done with the project.  Nevertheless, just became our equivalent of yet.  It inspired a growth mindset and kept us tackling projects step-by-step.  Our new house has fewer projects, but just is still part of our vernacular and it never stops giving us a laugh.  
Just works in teaching too…A student learning to read just needs to learn their letter sounds, then blend the sounds together to make some words.  Or a writer just needs to get some labels on the page and eventually a few words to build a sentence. Teachers who are starting a new program or new grade level just need to do a few assessments, score them and prepare the next lesson. Just gives me an idea of what’s next in a way that isn’t overwhelming but rather is a lower-stakes approach to progressing step-by-step.  
As we begin a new school year, many of us are facing new curricular changes and can apply the power of just. 
https://choiceliteracy.com/article/august-15-2025-positive-approaches-to-change/

Monday Motivator #3 2025-26

Proactive Supports from the NKC Behavior Handbook and Matrix

Continue to leverage these as you go into week 3:

Monday Motivator #2 2025-26

 

Research-Based Tips for Optimal Seating Arrangements

The right approach to seating works behind the scenes to keep students focused on learning while minimizing disruptions, research suggests.

By Youki Terada

August 18, 2025
https://www.edutopia.org/article/research-based-tips-for-optimal-seating-arrangements

Figuring out where a student should sit is more than just putting a name on a chart. It can determine who they talk to, how well they focus, and even how they engage with a lesson.

In fact, classroom seating decisions are some of the most powerful tools that teachers have to manage a classroom, working quietly behind the scenes to promote prosocial behavior and suppress distractions. “Student seating is one of the easiest, most cost-effective classroom management tactics available to teachers,” researchers conclude in a landmark 2012 study, after observing that student-selected seating tripled disruptive behavior, compared with teacher-assigned seating.

Experienced teachers use the layout of the room as an extension of their teaching strategy. Poor dynamics and behavioral issues can hide inside seating choices and spatial design, and adjustments to both can dramatically improve classroom outcomes.

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1. The Assigned Seating Advantage

Give students the freedom to pick their seats, and they’ll almost always congregate with their friends, leading to a chattier, less-focused classroom. That can also limit their exposure to classmates with different backgrounds and viewpoints—potentially locking in narrow perspectives that stick with them for years.

A 2021 study concluded that assigned seating pushed students to make friends with peers they might otherwise brush off, boosting new friendships by 50 percent. Strikingly, the simple change promoted friendships among students “regardless of their gender, class, or ethnic background,” with researchers noting that the resulting tolerance and attitude shifts carried “lasting consequences.”

For assistant principal Mary Davenport, asking students to pick their own seats is “nothing short of an emotional minefield.” That’s why she embraces seating charts, carefully putting together different configurations, depending on whether she wants productive whole class discussions, small groups, or independent work.

In a 2020 study, researchers found that teachers strategically use seating arrangements both as a classroom management strategy and to manage the social dynamics of the group. “This year there are a lot of disruptive students in the group,” says a teacher interviewed in the study. “They can all reinforce each other... so they are separated and then I fill the rest of the seating arrangement.”

Since students tend to mimic each other’s behavior—whether good or bad—there’s a big payoff to being thoughtful as you consider seating options for disruptive or disengaged students. In a 2024 study, researchers found that “students’ attentiveness may be most strongly influenced by the classmates sitting next to them, especially if those classmates are inattentive.” In the study, students who sat next to conspicuously bored or slouching classmates wrote half as many pages of notes and scored nine points lower on a follow-up quiz.

“If a student struggles with paying attention, sit them near the front,” writes Davenport. “If they struggle with side conversations, give them two assigned seats: one for independent work that’s isolated and one for collaborative work with a group.”

2. Seating that Supports Executive Function

The layout of your classroom can also support key cognitive processes like working memory, attention, and emotional self-regulation. Whether it’s wall decorations, a flurry of activity outside the window, or the sound of footsteps just outside the door, students are bombarded with visual and auditory stimuli that can derail learning. In a 2016 study, for example, researchers discovered that environmental distractions accounted for 25 percent of off-task behavior, making it a major “factor that accounts for loss of instructional time.”

Students who struggle with executive function skills should typically sit in areas of the room that are calmer, away from high-traffic spots, windows, or chatty neighbors. In a 2023 study on classroom distractions, researchers explain that the “increased cognitive effort to suppress the distraction in turn creates additional working memory load,” leaving fewer cognitive resources for the lesson at hand. Assessing the latest research on cognitive load theory, they conclude that “children with poorer attention skills (and therefore at greater risk from the increased burden on attention) experienced the greatest learning impact” from noisy, busy classrooms.

Young students who struggle with self-control often benefit from visual reminders of the classroom rules. In a 2025 study, researchers interviewed more than 100 first graders and concluded that they “are not necessarily aware of why their behaviour meets or fails to meet the teacher’s expectations.” By regularly discussing classroom norms and seating students who often forget the rules near anchor charts displaying the classroom rules, teachers can increase the odds that the classroom will function smoothly.

To foster self-regulation, dedicate a quiet space in your class as a calming corner to “help students develop essential self-regulation skills and normalize managing emotions in a healthy way,” writes elementary school counselor Marie Weller. The corner should not be a punishment, but a regular part of the classroom routines—a spot for students to take a brain break and practice calming techniques. Treat the calming corner like any other station in your classroom, suggests Weller, and provide a range of tools and activities to choose from—fidgets, sensory objects, and stress balls to reduce restlessness; deep-breathing exercises to calm down; or self-regulation worksheets, for example.

3. Improving Access and Engagement
One key to effective seating arrangements lies in matching the desk layouts to the activity, researchers explain in a 2020 study. Seating configurations drive very different dynamics: Rows limit distractions and work well when students need to be on-task during a lecture or when working independently. Clusters, meanwhile, can stimulate collaboration and expose students to a broader range of ideas, but they also increase the likelihood of disruptions and can decrease lines of visibility between teachers and students.

In addition, a 2015 study concluded that specific desk layouts led to different rates of off-task behavior. Over the course of three weeks, second-grade students were observed when sitting in rows, four-desk clusters, or a large horseshoe (with a third of students along each side). Although off-task behavior was lowest when students sat in rows, access to learning opportunity was not well distributed: “It was difficult for those who were sitting in the back of the class to be engaged in class discussions,” the researchers found, adding that “the lessons that are being taught should be the deciding factor on how students’ desks are arranged.”

An effective classroom layout isn’t just about where desks go; it shapes how students learn, collaborate, and engage. Traditional rows help with the “initial phases of the lesson—direct instruction, modeling, and the first moments of independent practice,” explains Head of School Matt Pitman—but forward-facing configurations can also make kids in the back of the room feel stranded and distant, while simultaneously depriving all students of the opportunity to read and respond to their peers’ body language.

Clusters of four or six desks with students facing each other, meanwhile, work well for brainstorming, peer review, and problem-solving. A horseshoe layout, for example—desks are arranged in an upside-down U with the teacher at the open end—allows students to face each other during whole class discussions and improves visual line of sight between the teacher and students. More unorthodox layouts, such as L-shaped clusters, Socratic circles, and jigsaw groups, can be used periodically to encourage cooperation, communication, and equal participation among students while building both content knowledge and social skills.

“When tables stay the same all day, every day, so too can the learning,” says Pitman. “A static room can send the message that learning is linear and predictable, when in fact it is dynamic and evolving.”

4. Flexibility Drives Academic Performance

In 2015, University of Oxford researcher Peter Barrett and his colleagues published a provocative study on classroom spaces. After visiting 153 classrooms in 27 schools, they discovered that physical characteristics of classrooms—light, temperature, and complexity of decor on walls, for example—accounted for 16 percent of the difference in reading, writing, and mathematics performance. The big insight: The “most successful design elements in classrooms are likely to be elements of flexibility that can adapt to new curriculum demands and new challenges.”

Classrooms with “distinct design characteristics” that promoted a sense of ownership—student work displayed on the walls, posters and charts that reinforced what was being learned, and furniture that made students feel more comfortable—created more effective learning environments, Barrett found. When teachers added features like an out-of-the-way reading nook or a coffee table for casual group work, it provided a personal touch that made the classrooms feel warm and inviting.

More recently, flexible classrooms have expanded to include kinesthetic seating options—standing desks, exercise balls, and wobble chairs, for example. After long periods of sitting still, off-task behavior can jump as high as 50 percent, according to a 2021 study. However, second-grade teachers who added movement-friendly seats saw on-task behavior spike to 89 percent, while students remaining in traditional seats but exposed to flexible options reached 87 percent on-task behavior—suggesting that letting students have the option could boost their sense of autonomy and help them focus.

Rearranging the furniture in your classroom won’t automatically improve student outcomes; your teaching also needs to change. A 2021 meta-analysis confirms that the biggest improvements “occurred in classes where teachers capitalized on the affordances of the flexible learning space for pedagogical gain.” Form follows function, and it’s the transformation in classroom dynamics—subtle shifts in how students interact with each other, the teacher, and the physical space—that lead to dramatic improvements in engagement and attention. It’s not the furniture itself, but the active use of space to support different ways of learning that moves the needle.